May 18, 2012
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{the mess of being mom}
this morning while clearing the dishes from the table after breakfast i noticed something on the wall behind.
dark brown, sticky, and splattered from about halfway down, all the way to the baseboard.
i rolled my eyes and went to get the washcloth.on my hands and knees, scrubbing away, i felt my irritation grow..
what was with these kids of mine anyway?
haven’t we tried to teach them about being diligent. mature. serving others in the family?
sheesh. what about just some plain ole responsibility and cleaning up after themselves?
and then. somewhere in the middle of my fuming and planning out all i was going to say to them later…
a memory flash through my mind.
at dinner. a few nights earlier. and a certain freshly poured, full to the top glass of ice tea getting bumped by MY elbow!
and not just a little tilt to the side spill. but a full on knocked over and crashed to the floor spill.
i had cleaned the table. but.. guess i never noticed the wall!!!i stopped cleaning and sat back on my legs as i realized -
it was my mess. not the kids.and i sat there.
just kinda still for several minutes. looking at the remaining spots on the wall.
thoughts of this past week turning round in my mind. other spots now so glaringly obvious.
of the challenges i felt on the parenting front. the frustrations.
the words spoken much too sharply. the attitudes. the tears. the exhaustion.and i look down at the damp wash cloth in my hand and sigh.
yes. how much of this mess is mine. not my kids.as my friend rachel said, “So much of the ‘stuff’ that i react to in parenting is MY stuff coming out more than my kids.
They just happen to be in the (war)path when i deal with it.“and since i was already in a good position for it, i bowed my head.
not sure exactly of the words that formed together..
but it had to do with once again, recognizing how much i need Him.
****
she now has enough for TWO!
and when you ask her to smile, this is the face she’ll give you! usually followed by a real one, because of course, we’re all smiling back!
´¸.·¨) ¸.·¨)
(¸.·´ (¸.·´ (¸.·¨¯`♥ amber
Comments (25)
The mess I have been left to clean up made by my family is the blessing that I have a family, and a home to clean:):)
That is one adorable little girl.
Oh boy. First, her picture “smile” cracks me up. This reminds me of an episode of Friends.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eq6br4KU9e4
And boy oh boy. I’m with you on the parenting. When I signed up for this I was thinking cute babies and funny stories. Oh and I’d feel so blessed all the time I’d just be happy. Right? I mean, where’s that parenting option? I must have signed up for the wrong one where I’m tired and confused and annoyed and largely just fumbling around.
that picture of reese in the mirror is totally hysterical.
and i hate when i’m mad at my kids and realize that i am actually the one that is to blame that time
Thanks for sharing. And what adorable little piggie tails!
Thank you for reminding me of that. And what a sweet smile.
She looks freaked out by her piggies in that one picture; LOL. She’s so cute. I have to use water to brush Sarah’s hair into pig tails, it’s so thin and baby-fine….Reese’s looks the same?
what an adorable “smile”!!! you have a little munchkin on your hands
right on from all us moms Amber. Your little blondie is so adorable!
Yep. Been there. And wow, is it ever humbling to realize that is was ME, not my kids, that caused the mess, the bad day, the hurt feelings…. Rachel said it so well too.
And your little darling… oh goodness, her smile is too funny!
She looks like she just brings such delight!
MY mess…… oh shoot! guess it means i better keep on reading “my book”.
That’s an intense smile! Adorable little girl! I love her blonde pig-tails!
You made a very solid point on parenting and “messes” and I think we’ve all been there, and we will find ourselves there again and again…but trying our best and following our hearts in also in the mix… as is lots of smiles, laughter, love, and heartache. Life is a balancing act!
Reese is so adorable; I love the piggy tails and her smile.
I may have said this before, but a successful parent isn’t a perfect parent, but one who is willing to admit when they are wrong, ask forgiveness, and move forward. You are such an example of a successful parent, Amber!
Oh my yes… the lessons I learned from raising my kids… it’s not always so easy seeing the reflection of your own flaws… and yes, turning to God for grace.
Your music sounds pretty… I wish I didn’t have dial up so I could listen to it.
awe Reese is just too adorable with the cutest little pink-tails. Love this that you shared “So much of the ‘stuff’ that i react to in parenting is MY stuff coming out more than my kids. They just happen to be in the (war)path when i deal with it.”
I need to keep this in mind when dealing with my kids. Such wisdom in those words.
I’m telling you one of these days you need to write a book
yeah, it seems I have to repent of my own messy messes too often too ~
so so true. i over & over remind myself that frustrations over expectations not happening can not be pinned on them & therefore shouldn’t be taken out on them either.
here’s to refilling that ice tea glass & new mercies for a fresh starts!!
happy new week to you ~
Thank you. Having no children at home, I confess that I sometimes blame messes on my husband, only to remember I was the one. SIGH…. As you little one sang a while back….. “Jesus fix me everywhere!” Love the pictures. She looks sweet enough to snuggle for sure!
Been there too. My week sort of sounds like yours was….and I can clearly see how much of it was ME!!! (and hormones!)
Love what Rachel wrote too.
You’re going to have a fabulous week coming up, I can tell. =)
LOVE little Reese’s pigtails. I keep putting them in Sophia. Her pigtail time is ending soon and I’m not liking it….=(
Hope the rest of your weekend is a great one.
xoxo and a great big {{Hug}}
I’m really feeling my failings as a parent… but I guess I they will still glare at me when my toddler is a teenager, and an adult… I just pray she turns out in spite of me… in the mean time I’m encouraged by your words and the fact that I’m not the only one in this thing!
Adorable…well explained…understood.
laughing at reese’s lil tails and faces. both hysterical and adorable. and man oh man. and boy oh boy. yes. my messes. it’s usually in my clean up efforts that i realize the brown spots are…gasp. mine. afterall. it’s harder to point fingers of blame with my head and heart bowed…howabout it?
you offer so much encouragement amber, with your transparency and words about everyday real life stuff that we as women, wives and moms can relate to and connect in. thanks so much. once again. love.
“i was the mess, not the kids.”
woooooooh, yes, i know that feeling.
love that last picture: darling girly, ponytails, and cute top too….
Good stuff, Amber! Cool how God used that moment to teach you. And good for you for having a teachable heart! I admire that about you!
Man, this brought tears to my eyes. So true.
Love, love the pic of her looking at herself! To adorable!