January 3, 2013

• {decemberings}

  
  
  
  
  
  i sat down to write, but found myself staring out the window instead.
  the snow is falling in a gentle steady stream..
  and i’m thinking how like the days it seems.
  one after the other dissolving into the next.
  they fall in single fashion but join together to create this incredible blanket of beauty over all the dirt and bare..

  i look back on 2012 and funny, i don’t really see any of the individual trials that seemed so important at the time..
  but instead, i see this one great big covering of something wonderful~
  i think it’s called GRACE. and i love how it falls over my life.

  i’m sure everyone is saying it, but it really does seem just yesterday i was putting down our memories of christmas 2011.
  it’s hard to believe it’s been a year. so soon. already?
  and i always remind myself of my grandmother because she used to tell me the older you get,
  the faster time goes.

  apparently, i’m getting older!

  we got home from the states on monday. driving all day, getting in around nine that night.
  we unloaded the van and headed to a friend’s house for new year’s.
  someone asked if we weren’t tired. of course. but i can’t imagine new year’s without a party..
  and it seemed the perfect way to jump back in here.
  when we surround ourselves with people, we don’t have time to engage in self pity.
  my friends have helped ease the ache of homesickness which i was already feeling tightening down around my heart.

  
  
  shayne and i were talking how this is our third year to celebrate new year’s in canada. crazy!
  i remember that first one. how it makes me laugh now…
  we didn’t know a soul but i was determined to make it fun for the kids!
  we played games and watched movies and drank shirley temples.
  but in the end everyone fell asleep before midnight.
  and from my little furnished rental far from family and home and all familiar i watched the ball drop in new york
  and wondered what in the world life held in the days ahead..

  and yes. once again as i look back, i see His blanket of grace covering it all.

  that’s why as i think of this new year i feel for the first time there’s less fear and more hope!
  because maybe, just a little bit, i’m finally getting it after all these years. i can rest in His faithfulness.
  and that is where my joy is found. not in my circumstances but the comfort that He’s in control.

  even when it doesn’t seem like it. when i don’t feel like it.
  there is never a time He stops thinking of me. working in my life.
  every piece.. every thing that happens is part of something so much bigger.
  it’s not our story He’s telling. it’s His!

  we were made for His glory.

  and i love something my mom shared when i was home..
  that one of the ways we bring Him glory most is when He is recognizable in our lives.
  when we can identify Him IN us and when other’s can identify Him THROUGH us!

  that’s what life is about. not all these other things we get so easily side tracked with, but simply..
  to recognize God in every part and to make Him recognizable to others.

  we can make an invisible God visible to those around us!

  and it’s not by having it all together. or pretending to.
  it’s about coming to Him in all my neediness. again and again.
  realizing no pain is ever wasted. no part too broken.
  no mistake out of His reach. and no area too dark.
  He takes me as i am. mess and all.

  He gives beauty for ashes. don’t you love that!
  not instead of. in place of.
  there is a beauty that only comes from the ashes of our lives!

  it’s the kind of beauty only He can bring.

  as He takes our our injured flesh and wraps it around Himself, giving us life.
  and not just any life – life ABUNDANT! filled up. overflowing. complete.

  to me, that’s really the message of christmas.
  that when i needed Him most..He came.

  and He never stops coming…
  pursuing us. saving us. redeeming us. working in us. loving us.
  meeting us where we need Him most.
  at exactly where we are. just as we are.

  and because of that, we have a future. we have a HOPE!

  *****

  december was just packed with all kinds of wonderful..
  and my heart feels content with the fullness of memories

  here’s a bunch of pictures from some of our times~
   
  there were plays and school performances and a special night in the city with my man.
  there were parties and tons of games. lots of eating. and laughing till we cried.
  there were walks with arms linked together with those i love most..
  and sitting up late talking till the wee hours of the morning.
  there were movies and cuddling under blankets. warm fires and hot tea.
  there was shopping and singing at the top of our lungs…
  drives in our pj’s to see the christmas lights and caroling to random strangers.
  there was silliness and seriousness and surprises.
  of trying so hard to catch every single little detail. to want to soak it up. drink it in. to not forget.

  but really, the main thing, being reminded over and over that the very best things, aren’t things at all!!

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  

  happy new year friends~
  so thankful for new days.
  new beginnings.
  fresh mercies.
  amen!
  

  ·´¸.·¨) ¸.·¨)
  (¸.·´ (¸.·´ (¸.·¨¯`♥ amber

  • 2:06 pm
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