February 22, 2013
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{friday loVe}
the school called and said emma was sick and needed me to come get her.
i threw reese in the van and headed straight over.
still new to all this public school stuff i wasn’t sure the proper procedure…i went to the office.
the secretary wasn’t there. so i stood, waiting.two boys, obviously serving detention at a table not far away looked curiously at us.
i got the feeling they wanted to ask me to bust them out!
after a few more minutes of awkward glances between us and the detention boys i decided to forget about the rule of not going anywhere in the school without a supervised person and grabbed reese’s hand and headed down the hall.
i rounded the corner to her class.
she was standing there. just outside the door. snow pants and coat on.
her hat pulled down to the top of her eyebrows.
a little bundle of padded up fluff. it made me smile.
she spotted me about then and smiled back.
but as soon as i was close enough i saw the big tears ready to fall in spite of the smile.i dropped down on one knee and hugged her.
“oh, sweetie.. are you feeling so sick?”
sure that was the reason for the tears.she shook her head and wiped at her eyes with the back of her hand.
saying quietly as her voice cracked over the words.
“no. i.. was.. j..just.. so.. g..lad.. to.. see.. you.”and i hugged her tight and thought, this.. this is what makes it all worth it!
moments like this when you forget the frustration and exhaustion and messes and all those times of feeling you just can’t do it. and remember, all the reasons you do!
****and here’s some fun questions for conversation…
how old were you when you had your first child?
and what’s the biggest thing that’s surprised you about motherhood?going through some old pictures i found these from when emma was 3. some of my favorites.
wishing you a weekend of sweet mommy moments~
amber.
Comments (55)
Awe, that was a sweet post. I hope she feels better soon.
i was thinking of you this morning and wondering if you all are over sickness…i hope it’s soon a thing of the past for you all!!
those moments when your children love us are so precious. sometimes few and far between, but precious all the same.
i love these pictures and wait…wasn’t it just yesterday you posted those pictures?! wow. time marches on.
how old i was? 27. biggest surprise? hmmm….i don’t know. maybe just how very exhausting it is. exhausting and yet the most rewarding thing i’ve ever done with my life.
hugs to you friend!
♥
Aww! The kids sitting at the front in Alex’s school are not in detention, they are “office helpers” but at a younger age school it just might be detention. haha.
I was 21 when I had Alex, just a few days before I turned 22. I was not surprised by the work, I’d been raising kids since I was 8.
I was surprised how much I loved him. I mean, that baby was MINE and no one was getting him from me! lol
love those rewarding moments!
i was 25 1/2 when i became a mom. the biggest surprise was how HARD it is to be on call 24/7. i had half raised some of my siblings, so i knew how to take care of babies just fine- but to be the ONLY one most of the time (of course my husband helped out some) was something i was so unprepared for. that, and how much crying bothers me when it’s my own child. of course, neither of my girls were good babies.
also, amber, i want to know YOUR answers to those questions!
i was 25 when jase was born.
i think what surprised me the most was how frightened i felt to be solely responsible for keeping him alive! i have lived and breathed babies since i was a little girl and i didn’t think anything about one would “scare” me. but i was just sure i would miss something and that would be the end. in retrospect, it was probably crazy postpartum hormones talking more than anything.:)
I had just turned 26. The surprise? The seemingly endless colic. Being the second oldest of 12 I really thought there was nothing that could surprise me… but I really couldn’t believe how hard it was!:) But four babies later {three of them with bad colic} and a fifth one on the way… well the baby days really are short and I want to enjoy it more this time around even if there IS colic involved again!:)
Super sweet post. So many moments in a day I feel like I can’t do this. But so many moments in a day I am reminded of just why I AM doing this and why most of the time I love it!
I was 20 when I had my first. Biggest surprise….how much fun it would be.
Allison that same striped shirt Emma has on. Emma is so adorable in those pictures…love her hair.
Hope she is feeling better soon. I’m sure you were so glad to take her home that day, such a sweet moment.
Happy Weekend to you.
XxOo
Amber, I was 23 when Will (*Billy) as born….I was always the one that told my girlfriends in school that I really didn’t want children, my focus was all on my career and my looks (*hard to believe now! lol!). As my hubby and me grew in our relationship with Christ, we realized part of being right with God was to open our arms to what HE referred to as a “Gift”. One Sunday morning at Bethel after your brother, Scott, recited a whole chapter from the Bible (*he must have been like 6 years old and was so absolutely adorable!) my hubby looked over at me with tears running down his face and said, ” I want to have one of those some day!”….this totally scared me to death!! On the way home that day we discussed it further….I politely turned to him and said, “well, you married the wrong girl then!” After praying about, reading the Bible in more detail about the blessing of Children….I went back to my hubby, repented and we started to “try” to have kids….at 9 months into it, I determined that my attitude had been so replusive to God that He was going to keep us froming ever having children! I went to the altur (*at Bethel), laid it all out before the Lord, repented for being such a “womens’ libber”, begged God to forgive me and give us a child….the next month, we were pregnaunt with Will. I will never forget what it felt like to have the nurse lay him in my arms…the deep thoughts of how I almost allowed the enemy to win and convice me that children were more of a curse than a blessing…the greatfulness to God that He had heard my repentence prayer and had shown grace and mercy to us and granted our hearts desire to have a child….a flood of thoughts racing through my heart and head! I have NEVER forgotten that moment! So grateful God changed my heart about being a mother….no regrets! Six wonderful children and 10 grandkids later, I will always be greatful to your brother for reciting those verses that day! God is good to continue to work on us and help us to change to be more like His dear and precious son Jesus! Love you sweet girl and love the hear the beautiful stories of your journey! Love and Blessings to you and yours always! Give your sweet momma a hug from me! <3
So so so sweet! What a beautiful girl and such a special mommy moment. I know that exact feeling you described having surprised my girly at her school.
It also makes you realize that they know just how loved they are.
Had my first child at 22 and the biggest thing that has surprised me most about motherhood is probably the quote you shared on the adorable picture of Emma.
Just how much I could possible love them, feel for them and of course worry about them.
Have a wonderful weekend with those adorable girlies of yours!
This is just so so sweet!
Those moments when the curtain falls back and we see motherhood for the glory it is. Yes!
It makes it all worth it!
I became a mother at 24, and I could not believe how hopelessly in love I fell.
Yes, it was so much work and sleep was rare, but I could not believe how much I LOVED it.
I LOVE that quote too on the picture, one of my favorites.
Happy weekend!
I was 21 when my first baby was born. I had another at 23, then a miscarriage. Next baby came when I was 27. #4 30, #5 35. Last 2 were born when I was 42, and just barely 46. The thing that surprised me about being a mom, is that once you’re a mom you’re Always a mom. Forget that 18 and “they’re off to college and on their own” stuff. Mine are all grown, and they can still either break my heart, or make me love them so much and be so proud of them. Usually more of the latter, thank God.
i was 25 when Bump was born
and my biggest suprise was how much i love it!!! i’ve never really been a kid type person so i was nervous about that, but there is just something about your own 
@Foodhog - thanks so much! you’re always sweet to comment and rec.
)
@foreveranoatneygirl_n2Hisown - ”exhausting and yet the most rewarding…” YES!
big hug right back girfriend~
@aSeriesofFortunateEvents - well, there was no sign that said “detention.” but they were sitting at this white table pushed against the wall, eating their lunch. maybe they WERE “office helpers” just on lunch break.
) but i did feel like i should slip them a file or paper clip or something. 
)
and i had helped with my little brothers alot too but nothing seems to prepare you for your own. as you said, they’re MINE!
always amazed at your life story. it inspires me!
@richlyblest - yes. i could never stand to hear my babies cry. can’t stand to hear any baby/ kid cry, but especially my own. and those times when they’re little and you haven’t a clue what is wrong with them.. ugh, i thought my heart would rip right out from being sad and frustrated i couldn’t help them.
kate was born when i was 22. same year i was married!
and i think the biggest thing for me was how much it revealed the selfishness in my heart. i always thought i was fairly self-less. ha! 
but kids seem to constantly expose what is truly in my heart like nothing else… and still to this day it surprises me!! i have so much growth to do. so, so much!!
@mlt10202002 - oh, yes! i was the mom that ran into their room every 5 minutes to make sure they were still breathing!
i used to have all those worries too. still do.. that something will happen to one of my kids. but now that they’re older i worry a little less that I’LL be the one to kill them. 
except the rare parent/teen argument when you tell them.. “hey.. i brought you into this world and i sure as heck can take you out!!!!” 
))
@WasabiBek - ohhh.. colic! i’ve never had a baby with it, but friends who have say it just seems endless!!! glad you already see the perspective that it’s not. you’re so right – the baby days are gone in a flash compared to the rest of it. i don’t know if i realized you were pregnant again.. or maybe.. i don’t know. lots of friends pregnant right now i get confused.
but congratulations if i haven’t already told you. i think 5 is a great number! 
{we’re working on it}!!! 
)
@Elizabethmarie_1 - yes the fun! there are moments especially as the kids get older where i think.. i just LOVE being around them. they’re my favorite people and i wouldn’t want to hang with anyone else. so cool that we can birth our own friends!!
) okay, that sounds weird, but you know…
@Mommaof6 - aw. mrs.b.. your story gave me chills!!! what a powerful, powerful testimony of God’s ability to change hearts. and to think what you might have missed were you not obedient. wow! a great lesson for us all to hear~
i remember babysitting for you.. of always being struck by the JOY you seemed to get from your kids! i’m grateful for you example and influence in my life. even after all these years.. still breathing encouragement back to me, now in my own mommying journey. *thank you* love you too!
I became a mommy at 21. I remember telling someone, “I know people tell everyone their babies are cute but they mean it when they tell me.” lol Little did I know that every mommy thinks her baby is the prettiest.
@Cluesy - yes! the heart walking outside my body thing.. still gets me too!!! like i just FEEL so strongly for them. with them. know exactly when something’s off or not right. shayne will even say, “how do you know that..” i think as mom’s, since we’ve CARRIED that little one inside us, they always stay a part of us. always.
and me and girlies plan on having a fun weekend. shayne and ben are gone to a retreat so… IT’S PARTY TIME!!!!!
))
@lifeisadance - ”when the curtain falls back..” i like that mental picture. exactly.
@ata_grandma - oh, i just LOVE you!!! the more i hear about your life the more i want to sit and just LEARN from you. and i can’t believe you said that about “once a mom, always a mom!” that’s exactly what my mom says. that yes, from the minute you know they’re inside until… FOREVER! you never stop thinking of them. worrying. praying. hoping. wishing. and your heart just swells or falls depending on where they’re at and what they’re doing..
i love it too that you had your last kids in your 40′s. makes me less afraid of that knowing others have done it too.
@brokenmiracle - it’s funny how with your first it all just comes naturally. i remember shayne was really nervous w/ kate because he said he had never been around babies. didn’t know how to hold them. and had never changed a diaper in his life. i assured him it would come, and i was amazed! he was more of a pro than me.
he would just whip those diapers out like no one’s business and get up in the night and hold her and rock her. i love how parenting shows you that side in your partner you never knew about. 
) and i like that you call her “bump.” cute cute!!
@TrentTribe - haha!! too funny. yes.. i think we as moms look through rose colored glasses when it comes to our kiddos! and not just about their looks.
) {but your kids are pretty darn cute. just sayin} 
)
Precious pics of Emma! Such a sweet story – the precious love of your child for you. That was what surprised me the most – that my babies loved me so much, even though I was such a failure at times! I was 23 when Nathanael was born, and I remember being so amazed at the love in that babies eyes, from the very beginning! And it was for ME!! I’m still amazed – they all still love me! <3
Ahhh….poor little Emma, hope she feels better soon. I can just see those tears welling up in her eyes so releived to see her Mom because in her mind Mom means everything will be fine.
I was three days shy of my 23rd birthday when my 1st child was born, he was the best birthday gift ever! I was thrilled to be a mother and he was the perfect baby but I was surprised by how exhausted I was at about week three. I can remember literally crawling up the stairs because I was totally drained and realizing I had never been that tired in my entire life!
@TrentTribe - just had to say i LOVED your comment! so funny. but true. for both of us.
ALL of us.
i’ve been thinking about you with sick kids. and the whole copy-catting long distance.
we are better here. gulping as i write that. ha. don’t want to mess with a good thing.
and hope that everyone is back to normal there asap in time for a fabulous weekend!
super sweet post. exactly what i needed to read today. in THIS WEEK.
The Farmer reminds me sometimes, “you ARE doing what you love.”
oh that’s right. I AM!!!
i was 25. and shocked that i was THE ONE to take the baby home.
and surprised by the gigantic love.
and fatigue.
and selfishness.
and joy.
i’m STILL shocked REGULARLY by pretty much those same things.
especially THIS WEEK.
except for the bringing the baby home part.
@grace_to_be -
yes, the selfishness. and how the kids expose that (and other weaknesses). i never thought of myself as some sort of perfect person, but being a mom has shown me how far from perfect i really am! in my case, anyhow, the young stage (before you can reason with them and your hard work starts paying off) is when i really find what i’m made of, and it’s definitely humbling!!
This is simply beautiful and moving Amber . Mother and children atre narrowly tied .
The photos also are superb .
My wife got her first child ( the famous duchess Craole ) at 24and me I was 29
Love
Michel
RYC “I’ve always thought twins would be so cool to have” you say .It was my wife ‘ s dream but we got 6 children one to one and it is not so bad for your needed and frail sleep
I was 29, almost 30 when my daughter was born. I was a week over 34 when my son was born. I had miscarried several times, and by the time my son was born, I had a strong sense that if I had a boy we would be done, not because I wanted to be, but because that was the way it was going to be. I did get pregnant again after my son, but again miscarried early. I grieved for those lost children for a few years in my thirties, and still wonder what it would be like to have more, but now I can happily wait for the grandchildren! And there have been many many reasons to be glad I have two.
Very sweet post. It’s one of the hardest parts of having my kids IN school (and not home, like I was). Knowing I won’t be there when something difficult happens. But I’m learning to let them navigate things. And I’m learning that the Lord places sweet teachers in their lives to watch and care for them, too. My kids have their dad at school! Although he will never understand why I can’t WAIT to find out if they are OK before I jump in the car and come rescue them.
The most surprising thing to me about parenting has been how selfish I am. Thankful the Lord is still changing me.
@pettybunch - yes. i’m always amazed by their love too. even after i’ve totally flopped and failed and yet still.. the way they let go so easily. forgive. bounce right back. i learn so much from them!
@DawneElla - i laughed about you crawling up the stairs.. not AT you, with you! because i’ve done the same same thing in those first weeks i think with all of them! oh, the exhaustion. makes me feel tired even now remembering it!! :/
@down_onthefarm - yes. i’m still surprised it all still surprises me!!
) and we ARE doing better! this w/ emma was actually last wk. which started our whole wk of up and down w/ this virus, but i think it’s behind us now… or atleast i told them cindy’s kids were over it so they better hurry and pretend to be too!! 
)
@fauquet - haha. yes! i suppose if you’re tired with just one, you’d be twice as much w. two!!
)
@LadyoftheManse - oh, i know the pain of miscarriage. and yes.. the wondering of what our family would look like with those missing babies in it! but i believe God is the one who ultimately builds families and like you, i’ve learned to be content with what He’s given!
@Mrs. Troop - yes! wanting to rescue them.. that’s our instinct isn’t it? i too have had to learn to let go and try not worry. but i admit when the school called you would have thought there was a fire in our house i shot out the door in such a flurry!!
) there’s nothing worse than the idea our kids NEED us and we’re not there..
35 for my first pregnancy last one was at 44 and I am currently 12 days late so we’ll see what happens all the tests, and yes I have taken more than one say negative!!…sigh….
My first was born when I was 32 — I had babysat families of kids for years but when they placed him in my arms when leaving the hospital I’ll never forget thinking “I don’t know if I can do this!” I did do it and twice more after that!!
I was almost 25 when my first was born. The biggest surprise to me, and still is!, is that children don’t know anything! Ha! No, seriously, EVERYTHING they know, they’ve learned in some way or another- by watching me, listening to conversations, formal teaching, or being told over and over and over and over again! As a mom, and a homeschool teacher this is huge. It is such a dynamic responsibility to train our children, to impart character to them, and guide them in making our faith their own.
i don’t know if i told you happy birthday … i’ve been such a lame blogger lately …. just reading, not commenting or posting. happy birthday if i missed that : )
i think it’s cray to say ‘i remember emma at that age’ ’cause i’ve been reading that long!!
i was 23 when sailor was born. and i was feeling pretty bad reading everyone’s comments about love & fun & amamzing being what surprised them about motherhood. i remember thinking very clearly the thing that surprised me most was how selfish i was. …. with my time, or my plans, etc!! ah, how could a baby do that : ) and then i read your comment & sighed, lol
i loved her, too …. for the record, with a crazy passion : )
Hope Emma is feeling better! Poor sweetie!
I was 16 when I had my first child. What surprised me was that I had NO CLUE what to do when he cried! Everyone told me that being a mom was going to be fine. I would know what to do when the time came. They lied. He would cry and I would try everything I knew. Nothing worked. We were both miserable.
I was a mom at 20. The biggest surprise? It was way easier than everyone had told me. He slept through the night early on. He hardly cried and nursed right away. He made me think I could have more than one. lol.
@Missionfieldof5 - know the “sigh” of those negative tests, friend. hope this time two little pink lines shine back at you!
@myhopeisinjesus - oh, i know! with all mine i had that same feeling, “can i do this?” i STILL have days where i ask that.
)
@cuz_He_lives - oh, i know. i think of that often too. and it’s so sobering.. gulp!
@H0LDfast - see. i KNEW you were my sister from another mister!
)))
@SealedbyGrace - aw. bless you. i think with all mine i had that same helpless feeling at one point or another.. sometimes when they’re upset there’s just nothing you CAN do.
@resolved2worship - so the rest of the kiddos owe a big thanks to scott!
)
look at those gorgeous curls. what a sweetheart. aww, i’m glad that she was so happy to see you. i know how when you feel sick you just want your mom, i’m sure it was such a relief to know you were there and you’d look out for her.